Casting Special!
An announcer with Don Pardo type voice: This is the true of when over 40 thousand jobbers come to get the chance to be on the NEW tv show Real World Jobber style, find out when happens when workers stop being fake and start getting real, Real World Jobbers Style.
(a video package rolls of several shots of high spots and trademark moves being put on our band of jobber friends, the some bottle rockets go off, and sparklers light and a shot of casting managers Mary Ellis Ross and John "The Prince" Harris sitting behind a rather large rectangular shaped desk.)
Mary: WELCOME EVERYONE TO REAL WORLD JOBBERS CASTING SPECIAL!!! We are here taped LIVE from the Franklin Rec-Hall here in BEAUTIFUL South West, Delaware!! I'm Mary Ellis Ross and I'm joined with my ever present co-hort "The Prince" John Harris!
John: Thats right Mary, we have a show to cast so lets get right into it with the special video package showing you the process so FAR!
(Cheesy
Video music starts as a shot of a Jobber walking into his house, which
is a real shithole.)
Announcer:
Hey Jobber Joe! you tired of coming home to this rat trap after you get
the living hell kicked out you ever night?
Jobber
Joe: Damn right!
Announcer:
Well you should join the cast of the new show Real World Jobbers!
JJ:
Yeah I'm a jobber I could do that! but how do i join i bet its hard! (gives
a stupid look at the camera)
Announcer:
THe hell it is joe! All you have to is make a video tape of yourself telling
us why you should be on the show and send it to
Mary: Whoa that was.....Great!
John: Uh yeah super even.
Mary: OK heres the deal we
got over 50 thousand video tapes as entries to the contest!
John: Wow mary that sure is
alot of video tapes!
Mary: Yes it is but go thing
for us our staff has already narrowed down the field to the final 15 contestants!
(a voice of stage is heard
saying "Then why the hell did
John: Thats Super! Lets take
a look at them RIGHT NOW!
(Video opens
with a shot of a split screen in 15 sections with various jobbers in each)
Announcer
with NWO Informertype voice: 15 jabronies, only 7 will have the right to
join the cast of Real World Jobber Style, the following men
are finalists in this damn contest, (after each name a pic of the
guy comes up follwed by their name in flames over it)
Lash Leroux..........Headbanger Mosh........ Christian.......Johnny Swinger..... Barry Horowitz.........Glacier.......Riggs.......Gillberg .....Matt Hardy......Blue Meanie.....Barry Darsow.....Little Guido.....Droz.....Johhny Grunge of the Public Enemy....and Chris Chetti
Awniv: By next week the final seven will be chosen and revieled on the very first episode of "Real World Jobber Style" So watch da f**k out kid!
John: Whoa Mary this looks to
be "cutting edge" and risky huh!!
Mary: Sure does Chip!
John: John
Mary: Its in the back.
John: No that my name.
Mary: your names "its in the
back"?
John: No its....AAHH DAMN IT!
I can't take this cheesy promo crap no more fuck it! I'm John harris watch
the show or not but RESPECT MY FUCKIN AUTHORITY!(gets up and throws his
chair)
Crowd:(Chants) Jerry! Jerry!
er uh Johnny! Johnny!
John:Oh shut the fuck up!
(Mary has ran to the other
side of the studio as John goes into his rage rant)
Mary: Ok I'm Mary Ellis Ross,
till next week when the show debuts GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY!
(Carnage breaks out in the studio
as the camera fades out, and a fat little man in a black cowboy hat is
heard to be screaming about it in the crowd)